Monday, January 07, 2008

Vexed By Speculation

The ball of anxiety is crying out to me. I am locked in a loop of worry. I pray for my mind to change. I cry out to the LORD for help. But voices only briefly subside. I hear conversations that haven't happened and ones that haven't happened yet.

Feeling friendless in a mad mad world. Hoping to help but foreseeing ruin. A reproduction of the big bang but in reverse. What? Wishing no one had ever split the atom. Do nuclear reactions need to be messy? No,but they always put off a lot of energy. Why oh helium why oh lithium must you fall apart? Will the ball win? Can I hold up to the pressure?

Why is speculation wrong now. That is how we figure out the world. We are smart. We can deduce things. I am only sad that some of our ponderings are true.

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